What is low self-esteem?

Low self-esteem is a negative or critical view of oneself. It means having an overall poor sense of self-worth, often accompanied by feelings of inadequacy, unworthiness, or self-doubt. People with low self esteem tend to judge themselves harshly, struggle to see their strengths, and often believe they are not “good enough.”

This mindset can affect every area of life, from relationships and career choices to mental health and decision-making. Low self-esteem does not just mean lacking confidence in one area—it usually reflects a broader, deeper belief that one’s value is inherently limited or conditional.

Self-esteem plays a pivotal role in how we view ourselves and interact with the world. Essentially, self esteem is the belief we have in our own worth, abilities, and value. When it’s healthy, self esteem allows us to face life’s challenges with confidence, form meaningful relationships, and pursue goals that align with our values. However, many people struggle with low self esteem, often without even realising it themselves.

11 Signs of Low Self-Esteem

Signs of low self-esteem


Low self-esteem can manifest in many subtle ways. Some common signs include:

  • Constant self-criticism or negative self-talk

  • Difficulty accepting compliments or praise

  • Fear of failure or chronic perfectionism

  • Comparing oneself unfavourably to others

  • Avoiding challenges due to fear of inadequacy

  • People-pleasing at the expense of one’s own needs

Why does low self-esteem matter?

Low self-esteem can contribute to anxiety, depression, unhealthy relationships, and difficulty coping with stress or life changes. It can hold people back from taking risks, pursuing goals, or expressing themselves authentically. Over time, it can lead to emotional exhaustion and a sense of being stuck.

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Where does low self-esteem originate from?

Our self-esteem is shaped early in life, often by our relationships with caregivers, teachers and peers. Experiences such as childhood neglect, bullying, criticism, trauma, or unmet emotional needs can leave a lasting impact on how we see ourselves. Even environments with good intentions, that focus heavily on achievement or appearance can foster a fragile sense of self worth.

How Therapy Can Help?


Rebuilding self-esteem is not about quick fixes; it’s about deep, meaningful work that involves understanding the roots of self-doubt, challenging unhelpful beliefs, and learning to relate to oneself with kindness. Psychotherapy offers a safe and supportive space to explore these issues.

Therapy can enable you to:

  • Identify and challenge negative self beliefs

  • Develop healthier self talk and thought patterns

  • Set appropriate boundaries

  • Explore early life experiences that shaped self esteem

  • Practice self compassion and emotional regulation

  • Build confidence through gradual exposure to challenges and successes

Over time, therapy helps individuals build a more stable and resilient sense of self.

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Practical steps


While therapy is a powerful tool, there are also daily practices that can support healthier self-esteem:

  • Practice self compassion: Speak to yourself the way you would to a dear friend.

  • Celebrate small wins: Acknowledge progress, no matter how small.

  • Set realistic goals: Avoid all-or-nothing thinking—growth is a process.

  • Surround yourself with supportive people: Connection and validation matter.

  • Challenge negative thoughts: Ask yourself: “Is this thought really true?”

  • Limit comparison: Focus on your journey, not someone else’s highlight reel.

Self-esteem is not fixed. With support, self-awareness, and intentional effort, it can grow. Therapy can be especially effective in helping individuals understand where their low self-esteem comes from and how to begin changing their internal dialogue. Building self-esteem means learning to view yourself with more compassion, respect, and honesty—not perfection, but humanity.

If you or someone you know struggles with low self-esteem, know that change is possible—and you’re not alone.

Useful websites

NHS – Raising low self-esteem

MIND- Self-esteem

NHS inform- Self-esteem help guide

Young Minds- self-esteem and mental health

Supportline – self-esteem and self-confidence